I've got nothing. I start this report by scratching my head. How, I scratch, can I explain just how nonsensical this movie is? Basically, this is a movie about nothing. Even imagining a pitch meeting for this movie, it lacks an idea. I see a bunch of (English) guys sitting around, talking. In their English way. With their English humor. Probably sniggering and blimey-ing about the potential comic hilarity of making a movie about a cute English girl. Who is a real ditz. But who is a saint at her job as a pre-school teacher. And maybe they decide to have this girl want something: By Jove, she should want to learn how to drive!
That's it. That's the movie.
For the first half hour, the lead actress (the happy go lucky one) is charming, magnetic, attractive. No, really, she's cute and she has a funny laugh. Very likeable. After 45 minutes, she's still cute, but now we wonder if she's a bit mental. Wait, no. She's so good with those kids! Let's give it a little more time. Twenty minutes later, still nothing happening. Oh, right, the driver education guy may be mental. No, wait. Yes. He's mental. So what's going to happen?
Almost two hours in. Nothing. However, the film has misdirected the audience to believe something terrible was going to happen at least three times. Finally, the mental driver education guy has an anger burst. It must be pretty bad because even H-G-L can't crack a smile. In the final scene, the H-G-L girl is in a paddle boat on a lake with her friend. The camera pans out and up to a shot of the sky. End credits.
I'm not kidding.
Now cut to the award ceremony given by the international press. You know the one. The actress wins for her role in a comedic film. I've got blisters on my fingers from scratching my head. I don't get it. I've got nothing.